[OTA] Once Upon a Dream

[karatofquality]

Father's Day had seen Silas with his grandchildren, and paying visits to his other four 'children.' It had been a good day, if bittersweet.

Today, after the work day had ended, he'd gone to visit Isaac's grave site. Just over a year ago, he'd risen to King, and his son had been there to support him, to bring him tea and sit with him for a little while. Silent support, as always. His good boy.

He'd lost count of how many times he had told Isaac about the triplets, about the Suit, that he missed him.

But now he was standing in his favorite corridor, just reflecting on the last year. A lot had changed; a lot had remained the same. Even Silas wasn't the same man now that he'd been last year, but that wasn't a bad thing.

Comments

[thecutdiamond]

Small community though it was, the Deck was more than capable of seriously drastic changes in the course of a year or even a month. No one knows it as well as the Diamond Faces-- past and present.

And no one knows as well as Rachel the importance of taking a moment to reflect. She doesn't mean to stumble upon her King in the hallway, but when she does she pauses, ducks her head a little in greeting.

"You look thoughtful. Should I go?"

[karatofquality]

With a pensive expression, Silas looked to his former Queen and shook his head. "No, Lady. You are, as ever, a part of my thoughts, and because of that, you have every right to be here." Not to mention that this was just as much part of her castle as it was his.

It had been part of hers for far longer.

"Are you headed somewhere, or simply roaming?"

[thecutdiamond]

"If you're certain." She'd hate to intrude on what may be a private moment.

A slight shake of her head, "Just roaming. I find it helps to clear my head."

And with the anniversary that had so recently passed, she needed a clear mind to be actually able to sleep at night.

[karatofquality]

There were, truly, no private moments when one became a Face Card, particularly when one was King or Queen. He lived every day on call, 24/7; if something went wrong, he was supposed to be the first to get a phone call. He'd known that would be the case when he challenged Ashley last year, but he hadn't anticipated how heavily it would weigh on him.

"I'm glad one of us is able to have a cleared mind, then. How are you?" And he didn't just mean with regard to her physical state. He expected honesty, Rachel.

[thecutdiamond]

She had tried to warn him as well she could, before he'd started challenging, and she hoped that the support she could offer him was helpful to him, even though now it wasn't much.

"As cleared as one's can be," she replies with a thin sort of smile. At his query, her head tilts slighty to the side in her version of an almost-shrug.

"It's a hard month. But I'm managing." As well as can be expected, really.

[karatofquality]

"Slightly cleared is better than not at all," he reminded her with a sigh. "But at least there's that much, darling. I'm glad you're able to relax."

He understood the difficulty with the month. He'd be feeling the same pain in just a few months, himself. Of course, the deaths in her life had been friends, lovers, partners in crime, while his had been family -- mother, father, son -- but the ache was the same and there was no making it stop.

"The best thing you can do to honor them is to live each day to the fullest, remember. They wouldn't want to see you suffering."

[thecutdiamond]

"I know." Had known, for some time now, but it had taken all these years to realize it. "I try. And-- I hope you do, too."

She's well aware she's not the only one who suffers, and his is just a little closer than even her own pain.

[karatofquality]

He tried, but sometimes he just didn't have the energy to make the effort. Sometimes, he let himself be dragged back down by the grief, and blamed himself for Isaac's death. He wasn't responsible, and he knew that intellectually, but he couldn't escape the self-doubt sometimes.

"Each day is a new beginning. The pains of the previous day ease so that the new day's can come and be dealt with.Pain lets us know that we're still alive, hmm?" Or something like that.

[thecutdiamond]

Grief was a constant struggle. The only way to the other side of the intensity of it was through.

"It does. And it's easiest if we take things day by day." There's a tiny smile as she reaches to squeeze his shoulder slightly, "We'll make it through the hard days together, mm?"

And have enough of the good days, hopefully, to make those hard days a little less so.

[karatofquality]

"We will, indeed," he sighed quietly. But it was time to go; he was already late for dinner with Roisin, and he didn't particularly like the annoyed little sighs and huffs and snorts the sweet little woman gave in his direction when he was late.

"For right now, I have a dinner date with a Welsh woman. She doesn't much care for a lack of punctuality, so I'll see you soon." He tried to smile. Really. But then he was taking his leave.

[thecutdiamond]

"Take care of yourself, Silas." Surely she of all people has the right to request this of him, yes? "And talk to me, if you need it."

But for now, she lets him go.