[ota] watch out for the splatter

[messire_messer]

TGIF, isn't that what they say? Raphael has different reasons to be thankful for Friday than others. Friday is the day he gets to kick gently shoo Clive out of his office early so it can be emptied of the necessaries and painted over the weekend. He's got a lovely sunflower orange planned. Bright and unominous, just what the King ordered.

So if you're here looking for the King of Spades, Rap will apologise. Or not.

Comments

[messire_messer]

Oh, hello, uncle head cook. How wonderful to see you here. He gets to wave his paintbrush nice and menacingly. "Was asked to. By His Majesty."

[dum_spiro_servio]

Yes. If you Rub It In with Words and with a Paintbrush long enough, Iollan's expression was as likely to change as time flowing backwards to undo this wrong that was Raphael Scallion.

"And did His Majesty ask for his room to be defiled with some Barbaric shade of Neon Fluorescent Orange?"

[messire_messer]

Oh, how his face lit up. How his delight shone out of his eyes. "He specified bright. Something to let light into the room. Less ominous." Pose struck.

"I have chosen perfectly."

[dum_spiro_servio]

"And what is wrong with White?" White was bright, and would let light into the room, and was less ominous. Did Their King specify neon fluorescent orange? No. No He Did Not.

"Put that brush down lest you Hurt Yourself with it."

[messire_messer]

"If he wanted White then he wouldn't have such a difficult time choosing. That is why he delegated the task to me." Brush Not Put Down. How can he suggest such a thing.

[dum_spiro_servio]

"There are hundreds of shades of white. Of course he would have a difficult time choosing. You Will Not paint it orange."

[messire_messer]

He looked pointedly at the block of orange that already covered a wall and a quarter. "Certainly, I 'll just have all this come sliding off the wall and jumping back into the bucket. And he wasn't certain of a colour, let alone a shade of it. Had the same conversation."

[dum_spiro_servio]

"Paint. It. Over. Can you Not See how appalling it is?" Just because the King said he wasn't certain did not mean that the walls should be painted some disreputable colour.

[messire_messer]

"There is a total lack of appalling in this room. It's chosen, it's being painted, and unless the King changes his mind this is the colour it will be." Huff. Iollan would have to physically remove him from the room to stop him.

[dum_spiro_servio]

"Need I gain the attention of security personnel?" Because he could. And he could tell them all manner of things about this wretched Scallion and how he broke in here Unlawfully to deface the King's chambers.

[messire_messer]

Unlawfully. What. He was here totally Lawfully. "And when they're here and the King finds out, he'll wonder why you're disrupting my work on his office."

[dum_spiro_servio]

"When he sees the state of his wall, The Only Thing he will be questioning will be the state of your sanity."

[messire_messer]

"He'll be questioning why he didn't ask me to help before," he fired back. "Do you like dawdling in my company so much?"

[dum_spiro_servio]

"Absolutely not. But you will leave this room this instant, Raphael Scallion, or I will have you removed."

[messire_messer]

That doesn't require a verbal answer. All that requires is Rap to turn his back on Iollan. Go on. Try it.

[dum_spiro_servio]

Iollan doesn't do it himself. He's had enough of dealing with the Scallion. Instead he's left the room, and Delegated this Most Unnecessary Task to some of the security personnel.

[messire_messer]

Rap will be delayed half an hour or so proving to them that he has the right to be there. It doesn't matter.

He just wishes he could see Iollan's face the next time he comes by Clive's office and finds it fully painted.