houseofcards_rp | [ota] beware, be canny and careful

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[ota] beware, be canny and careful

She doesn't regret it in the slightest. What's to regret?

Eileen is fully capable of making her own decisions. She's allowed to decide to leave Kevin behind and go visit the Spade dungeon. And someone--she's not certain who--is also fully capable of infinitely childishly telling Kevin exactly where he or she saw his theoretical charge slipping off to while he was turned around. And Kevin is not just capable but essentially required to tell her mother things like where her daughter was this past weekend.

Which means Eileen Eicheln has, for the first time in her life, seen her mother actually angry. It also means, for the first time in her life and very likely one of the first times in history, the Ace of Clubs is grounded.

Mr Kahl is allowed to bring work and keep her up to date with her studies. A student from Mr DeWitt's class is allowed to spend a bit of time letting her know what's she's missed. The King and Jack are certainly permitted to speak to their Ace at their convenience.

But everyone else? Is getting Kevin's most sympathetic smile and a firm shake of his head. "Seems house arrest is catching."

[ooc; Except probably anyone with half a reason can talk to the moodiest tween about how she done wrong. Kevin is secretly easy. Or just come shoot the shit with Kevin, I guess? o/]

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Argine's thoughts had been fully explained, in a detailed clarity Eileen hadn't known her mother to be capable of when it came to emotions. The obvious physical toll on the former Queen had kept the girl from responding in kind.

Elisha isn't frail. Elisha isn't actually her father. This is the perfect opportunity to let free the injustice of the fact no one's asked her about her own reasoning behind going at all.

The jut of her jaw, thankfully, is an unlearned hang-over from Edgar rather than any of her other major influences. It makes actually sitting straighter, lifting her head to look at him, come a little easier. "The problem as I understand it was that I didn't properly ask permission from an appropriate number of proper adults to see a friend, and didn't think of my own safety in leaving Kevin behind."

The problem of that friend being Julien is left aside for now. She has arguments to make about that later.

"I'll take that into consideration." His voice is mild, and he doesn't ask if she'd like to know what he thinks the problem is. He's aware she'd rather not know, really; it might have been twenty years since he was her age, but he remembered his mother's few good parental moments.

"I am not going to talk to you about your friendship with Julien," he says. "You're old enough to make your own decisions, and that's your mother's place." Not that he doesn't dislike Julien - he does, and would love to remove his influence - but that's a battle for a dozen other days. "But you've shown great disrespect for a King and Queen who are only trying to do what's best for their Suit. And that is why you've disappointed me, Eileen."

She knows it's coming. She's known it was coming since the careful click of the door closing behind him.

Anger is easier. Anger is less completely exhausting. Anger makes it less like his words have cut at a vein and left her heart hemorrhaging under the weight of his disappointment.

"How? By-- treating him like a person?"

"You snuck out, Eileen. You slipped in through a window and wheedled your way past the guards." Did she really think he didn't know? "You can treat Julien like a person without circumventing both his royals and your own. But you didn't. You suspected that I would say no, and Clive would say no, and Katya would say no - and you'll never know now, whether that was true or not.

"If you respected us - any of us - you would have asked. You didn't, and that's what disappoints me the most." He leans his elbows on his knees, his eyes boring into hers. "That's what upsets me, frankly. You didn't even consider asking."

The balance swings wildly. Between upset and angry, between hurt and full of bile, between the intellectual-emotional maturity people have come to expect of her and the raw unbridled immaturity that comes with puberty.

Her entire body jerks slightly as her face wrinkles.

"I did consider."

Clive and Katya, she considered, would have possibly said yes. But for the Clubs? Elisha would have said no. Argine would have said no. Kevin would have said no.

Her eyes have to drop from his.

And she knows why they would have said no, too. She knows that they have her best interests at heart. What she doesn't know is that the reason Elisha is couching this in terms of being Ace instead of being thirteen is...well. He figured this might actually have a snowball's chance in hell of sinking in.

And he's not Eileen's father. Not really. If he'd tried to be a parent instead of a king, it would have likely been thrown in his face. Still, he can't stop himself from reaching out to touch her shoulder.

"I love you, Eileen," he says. "And I know you think your mother and I are being unfair, but try to remember that we have your interests at heart, and it's because we love you."

There's a twitch, but she doesn't actually jerk away. He is, after all, her King.

And, in whatever way he is, her father.

"...what's... what's unfair, Elisha, is-- that it doesn't matter why I went."

She had needed to. She couldn't apologize to their satisfaction because she would have gone crazy if she hadn't gone.

"You went because you're Julien's friend, didn't you?" Because much as he'd prefer that wasn't the case, that was the situation he'd been presented with. He couldn't change it. "And because you're worried about him."

All understandable, but Julien would only been in the dungeon for a few weeks. He just wishes it could have waited - even as he realizes in retrospect that it wouldn't have.

"People must understand that." Elisha must. Elisha seemed to. That didn't follow was that Elisha still felt she ought to be here. "You and-- Katya and Clive and Mother understand that. That's what's not fair."

It felt like such a slap in the face, in moments like this. But then, maybe the punishment was what was meant for behaving like the child they encouraged her to be.

"Of course I understand, Eileen. Your mother probably understands, too." Though he highly doubted she approved in the least. Of Julien, of Eileen's relationship with Julien, of any piece of this.

"But just because I understand your reasons, doesn't mean it was the right thing to do. It doesn't mean that your mother isn't allowed to punish you for doing something that frightened her a great deal." He hadn't been scared for Eileen's physical safety - Julien, probably, wouldn't do anything to her. But he was bitter, angry, and undoubtedly willing to turn the Ace of Clubs against the Spades who'd put him there.

"Then how-- should I have done this?"

Because it hadn't been a choice. With all the people who had been taken away from her in the last thirteen--and especially the last two--years, it had felt physically impossible not to go see him. Not to reassure herself that he was, in fact, not gone forever.

"You all-- would have said no, and-- then I wouldn't have been-- able to-- Elisha, what could I have done without-- going insane?"

"I wouldn't have wanted you to go," Elisha tells her. "I still wish you hadn't. But if you had told me that you needed to see him, I would have taken you."

He wouldn't have been happy about it; Eileen probably wouldn't have been, either, and neither would Julien. But he would have done it.

"Would you?"

She wants to believe it. She wants him to be the sort of stunning, understanding father she's amalgamated Edgar and Andrew into in her mind.

She wants to disbelieve it. She wants him not to have hurt him if he really would have been that kind to her.

The tears that spring up manage, at least, to stay glittering in her eyes rather than actually falling.

"I would have." Argine would not have approved but...maybe would have realized that it was a way to avoid just this very situation. They hadn't had the opportunity, though.

She'd been so sure they'd say no.

"You need to trust your mother and I, Eileen. We're not ogres. We don't want you to be unhappy."

She had been certain they'd say no. A piece of her still isn't certain this isn't hindsight talking.

If she breathes slow and deep and studies her hands, she'll be able to hold the impulse to let the tears loose until he's gone.

He squeezes her shoulder again and stands up with a sigh, putting the chair back by her desk again.

"I'll see you at dinner, Eileen."

There's a false start before she can get words to come, soft and defeated, so much more appropriately like a child.

"...am I... not eating up here?"

It would be punishment not to be allowed to eat with him, after all. Then again, the way her mind was reeling, it was also beginning to look like more time with his disappointment would also be punishment.

"Not tonight, princess."

He hasn't called her that, really, since her mother grounded her. Certainly not during this conversation in which he's faltered between treating her like a child and like an Ace and not being sure which he should do.

"I think you could use some air."

The affectionate name is, of course, less prevalent in general these days. She's growing up. 'Eileen' is replacing most people's nicknames for her. Here, now, she's not sure why it startles the tears completely to her eyes.

He loves her. He's looking out for her. His complete disappointment is entirely her fault.

She'll be put back together at dinner, the appropriately moody mixture of defiant and apologetic. It's just she'll need these next few hours to wipe angry, confused tears off her cheeks.

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[ota] beware, be canny and careful

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...how many of their icons match. :|a

Enough that sometimes I wonder if Argine had a mad affair with a young Israeli soldier.

Knocking up an older married Six. Elisha you cad.